tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6726401108704027247.post9106494841314578416..comments2023-12-11T12:49:44.639-06:00Comments on Polish Mama on the Prairie: Tato, Tell Me About Our Story...Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12655147780375093626noreply@blogger.comBlogger11125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6726401108704027247.post-56314796361503524512011-05-13T22:11:23.472-05:002011-05-13T22:11:23.472-05:00I admit I kinda avoid to read too emotional posts ...I admit I kinda avoid to read too emotional posts in your blog, to not to get too much reminded of my own struggles. I tend to get caught in bad old memories and have difficulties to find the way out, so I try to look on the positive parts of life most of the time :)<br /><br />I have memories of the communism, tough I was little, and really, horrible, unspeakable things were happening :( Communism is truly inhuman, like a famous writer once described "like death and devil dancing together and partying". Thus, I can understand if your father forgets, maybe he really forgot, I forget many things too even if I witnessed them myself, and my memory is pretty awesome (for example I remember things I did or thought when I was younger than 1 year old, but forget what happened at certain times, albeit I was way way older). It is a sort of white fog obscuring too painful happenings, and this is a human protection from never healed trauma.<br /><br />There are certain things that cannot be repaired, and it is better for someone to forget than to remember and literally go insane. Plus, hard work is not a bad way to deal with trouble, one does at least something good and constructive :) Way better than drugs or crime or anything...<br /><br />I wish you find what you are searching for, but please be careful about researching, because the painful happenings from the past may reach you in the present :/ Many communist criminals never got punished, and live hiding what they did, and encountering the child of someone who knows about their crimes may lead to bad happenings. That is one of the reasons why I keep up such high privacy in my blog, it does not make the visitors happy, but my life and my husband's life is more important than posting photos of myself and my next environment.<br /><br />One safe and good thing is researching via Wikipedia Polska and Polish blogs, I very strongly recommend this :) You can learn a lot about what happened during the years your were growing up in the USA, and what happened when you were still in Poland etc. Puzzle pieces, which help seeing the bigger picture.Kasiahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02293453775852512888noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6726401108704027247.post-39973987975720801932011-05-13T20:01:02.787-05:002011-05-13T20:01:02.787-05:00I hope you find answers to all of your questions. ...I hope you find answers to all of your questions. I would want to know about my past and I would go to no ends to find that info. <br /><br />I feel for you Mama:)Bees With Honeyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17582469374291294113noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6726401108704027247.post-81030885896806912822011-05-11T15:26:50.718-05:002011-05-11T15:26:50.718-05:00Wow. It must be hard not knowing much about your f...Wow. It must be hard not knowing much about your family's history. I've taken it for granted that my grandparent have shared many stories but after reading this I think I should spend more time listening to them. Thanks for sharing your story.Jessicahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03169305509191258173noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6726401108704027247.post-56925510013955453712011-05-11T08:56:42.668-05:002011-05-11T08:56:42.668-05:00I think that's it. I'm looking for peace....I think that's it. I'm looking for peace. Understanding.<br /><br />And after this yesterday, I did some reflecting. "What am I REALLY looking for from my father?"<br /><br />I think it's more like the memories my husband has of his family. "Uncle soandso always liked to eat raw corn on the cob." Or "My babcia always loved thisandthis song." Little things that make the names and faces of the past more than just that, more human.<br /><br />And for my father to tell me what games he liked to play with his brother, or whatever it is. Just little memories that make names into humans, family. Do you know what I mean?<br /><br />I don't see it ever happening now but who knows. Maybe if I explain it to him that way, he will share. Or maybe it's really true. Maybe he no longer remembers.<br /><br />Thank you for your comments...Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12655147780375093626noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6726401108704027247.post-12235272622402942382011-05-10T11:24:25.326-05:002011-05-10T11:24:25.326-05:00I totally understand and I wish you best of luck i...I totally understand and I wish you best of luck in finding answers that will give you peace.Joanna DChttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17089162107021846118noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6726401108704027247.post-84675465495288318052011-05-10T10:03:15.112-05:002011-05-10T10:03:15.112-05:00Thank you for your supportive words and understand...Thank you for your supportive words and understanding.<br /><br />I think, Petits Choux, that this "baggage" is common for most immigrant children. And I think talking about it is healthy and might help others feel like they aren't alone in their feelings.<br /><br />Joanna D.C., I know about getting the information. I am not sure what I want anymore for my father to tell me about. It's a question I have always asked him, completely unsure of what answer I might ever get. I understand about him protecting me from whatever had happened before. I completely respect him as well. And I do keep it in mind. That doesn't make my own situation and feelings about being the child taken away any less or different, I am still the child taken away. And he is still my father who took me away to protect me. And also so that he could forget. I was hoping to capture all that in this post. I am not trying to disrespect any for it.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12655147780375093626noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6726401108704027247.post-74327454175684311382011-05-10T06:54:12.477-05:002011-05-10T06:54:12.477-05:00Wow... If you know the town where your father was ...Wow... If you know the town where your father was born, that info should not be hard to find… If your family was Catholic, a local church would have all your family history… You could also contact the local library and inquire… I was born and raised in Poland during Communism… My childhood and watching my parents do things they had to do in order for the family to survive were indescribably difficult… I NEVER talk about it simply because it’s too painful.… It is possible that your father wants to protect you from finding out things that he may have been forced to do to protect his family, leaving his parents behind and running to another country… You really should keep that in mind… <br />Regards, JoannaJoanna DChttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17089162107021846118noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6726401108704027247.post-40457761260721590632011-05-09T15:29:13.983-05:002011-05-09T15:29:13.983-05:00Your family history gives you a rich cultural heri...Your family history gives you a rich cultural heritage but also a lot of psychic baggage which can be hard to deal with. EU citizenship for your children is a nice perk tho!Petits Chouxhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01268314630586572643noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6726401108704027247.post-56847070504186846542011-05-09T13:55:37.062-05:002011-05-09T13:55:37.062-05:00You know I understand you completely, I really do....You know I understand you completely, I really do. I may not be Polish but I KNOW I have Polish spirit inside me - this spirit makes me who I am and is what gives me my integrity. <br /><br />Nobody really asked my Grandfather about his time in Poland and I think it was through fear - fear that we didn't want to upset him or stir up terrible memories. So noone asked for a long time. As I got older though I knew I needed to know about where he came from - I needed to know about him and I started my search. I left question after question on Polish geneology sites. <br /><br />Then, after a long spell in hospital (my Grandfather had heart problems which we knew were terminal) I was sitting with him alone in the hospital room and I just asked him outright. And he told me - just small bits of information (many tears were shed). I think he knew that his time on this planet was getting shorter which is why he told me and I'm so glad he did. I may not know everything about his life in Poland but I have something to be going on with and for the time being it's enough but I still have a void inside my heart that I know one day I will need to fill.<br /><br />I totally understand too about dealing with problems the Polish way. You put your head down, do not complain with what you have been dealt and just get on with it the best way you can. This was my Grandfather completely and this is me too. I am terrible for bottling things up and just getting on with it - my husband will vouch for this!! But it is the Polish way - you deal with it yourself because you are proud.<br /><br />In a sense you are not alone - because I understand you and how you feel.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6726401108704027247.post-81683044214042068312011-05-09T13:50:33.640-05:002011-05-09T13:50:33.640-05:00Your posts about your past always leave me speechl...Your posts about your past always leave me speechless. The emotions are just so deep. Your stories actually remind me of one of my favourite authors - Victoria Hislop. Reading your posts is like reading one of her books. :) And I can somewhat understand why your dad wants to forget. For us, it is a part of our history and heritage but for people like him, it's a painful part of life they went through. I hope someday though that you will get to know the whole story.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6726401108704027247.post-71015314637919565842011-05-09T13:49:04.814-05:002011-05-09T13:49:04.814-05:00This comment has been removed by the author.BeetleBuggyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16865369079121547094noreply@blogger.com